Tonight, I had speed work on my training schedule. The warm-up started as soon as my feet hit the pavement just outside my apartment door. Two miles later the first 2-minute interval started. One minute into it, my legs felt like they might collapse. I finished the interval, recovered and started the second one. Half-way through I could tell that these intervals were going to do more harm than good.
Initially I thought, “push through it! It’s good to do speed work on tired legs, because that’s when change happens!”
As I listened to my legs screaming loudly during the second interval I knew, I needed to let it go and adjust to what my body was telling me.
However, I was having trouble letting going of the fact that I’ve done very little speed work in the past year and at the heart of it all I want to run fast.
While I was busy beating myself up, I made a pit stop at the Shakespeare in the Park bathrooms (I think that theater has an official name, but that’s close enough). Just as I stepped inside and halted my jog to a run, I caught a glimpse of the expression I was wearing.
The look on my face did not say, “I love running!!!” I looked like I was mad at the world.
That’s when I realized, that I’m taking this a little too seriously. I run because I supposedly love it and if that’s the case then why do I often feel so tortured while running?
I can’t seem to let go of the idea that I’m not where I want to be with my running pace and am frustrated that most every run feels challenging. When I saw the look on my face in the bathroom mirror, I decided it’s time to actually start letting myself enjoy these runs and stop torturing myself with thoughts of not being good enough.
Do you ever torture yourself on your runs?
A facebook friend posted this Nike video, so I had to share it with you guys!
I definitely feel this way sometimes and as much as we’d like to meet our race goals, you’re right – first and foremost, running should be something we enjoy!
Cute video! Loved it 🙂
I did that for a long time. But I recently ran along a local beach and had an epiphany…running was relaxing & enjoyable! I was too busy enjoying the sound of the waves & seagulls, feeling the sandy, salty breeze on my skin, & watching the breathtaking San Diego sunset to concentrate on my run. It wasn’t my fastest run, but not the slowest eithet. And I felt satisfied and accomplished and relaxed when I was done. The miles flew by and I barely noticed.
That experience taught me to cut myself a little slack and just enjoy the act of being outside and running. I’m training for the San Diego R&R 1/2 in June, so there are plenty of opportunities to torture myself but I do it much less now 🙂
Hey, I just found your blog from GOMI and I love it!
The reason your blog came up was because Tina at Carrots and Cake copy and pasted (aka stole) some of your text in her latest giveaway post. Did you know about that?
Thank you for the compliment! Your positive feedback is greatly appreciated. Someone was kind enough to email me last night to let me know about her post.
I’m so glad that people like yourself are letting me know about the issue otherwise I wouldn’t have had a clue.
Jess, I hear you – not so much on running but how I see my bod change & how much I can & can’t do as I age.. it is tough to adjust the mental!
I am glad you listened to your bod – no more injuries, right! 🙂 But yes, we have to just learn to enjoy it & that we can do it whether it is fast or not so fats…
This might be my favorite post of yours, ever. Rock on. Run because you love it. Quit torturing yourself and just run. JUST RUN!! 🙂
I used to torture myself – mostly during training for my first half. I thought I HAD to stick to the plan. And I’d push through. Granted, got a great time for my first half, but definitely sucked a lot of the fun out of it. Coming back from 2 injuries right now has made me realize that it’s more important to enjoy it first and foremost.
I also found your blog through GOMI, really like the fitness tips you provide!
Thank you!
I saw that Nike commerical yesterday too! Love that its the girl who keeps running across the country while her boyfriend made it like 2 feet before collapsing 🙂 I wish I was running right now (injured. ugh.), even though I sometimes torture myself too with speed work! Its a love-hate relationship.
If hating my pace and feeling discouraged on runs was an Olympic sport, I’d win the gold. It’s hard to lighten up and relax, but when I do, blissful.
Here’s to more bliss!
Hey, did you get that from my wall, by any chance? I posted it this morning and I love it! Reminds me of Dustin and I because he’s not into running, ha.
Nope! My high school friend posted it last night. Love it!
I also found your blog through GOMI because of the Carrots n Cake issue. I love it! I’m hooked! Hopefully you’ll get some new readers out of the unpleasant situation!
I completely relate! In fact, I almost wrote a similar post tonight, but couldn’t articulate it nearly as well as you!
I love this post too Jess. It’s so honest and true. It shouldn’t be torture. We run because we can and because we love it, although I’m pretty sure that I look tortured regardless. I just saw that Nike commercial last night and loved it. It made me happy but also wish that I could run!